Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself

Melody Beattie is an American author, journalist, and self-help expert, best known for her pioneering work in the field of codependency. Born in 1948 in St. Paul, Minnesota, Beattie had a challenging childhood marked by neglect, abuse, and early exposure to alcohol and drugs. Beattie’s mother was married multiple times, and Beattie’s siblings were subjected to various forms of abuse. As a young girl, Beattie turned to alcohol and drugs to cope with the trauma, leading to addiction that would last for many years. In her early 20s, Beattie found herself in a series of unhealthy relationships, including a brief marriage that ended shortly after the birth of her son. This experience, combined with her own substance abuse issues, led her to seek help and ultimately pursue a path of recovery.

Beattie began attending Alcoholics Anonymous, which helped her immensely in her recovery. After two years of sobriety, she married a man who was well-known for his work in the chemical dependency field. However, she soon found out that claiming that he was seven years sober, he was still abusing alcohol. Beattie, who had previously felt like she didn’t understand the behaviors of codependents, found herself becoming codependent over the course of her marriage. She was put in charge of running a support group for the family members and loved ones of people with alcohol use disorder; there, she started to recognize herself in the stories of others, prompting her to explore these patterns more deeply.

Beattie’s personal journey of healing and self-discovery inspired her to write about codependency, a term that was relatively unknown at the time. In 1986, she published her groundbreaking book, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself, which quickly became a bestseller and established her as a leading voice in the self-help genre.

Drawing on personal experiences and insights gained through support groups for family members of people with substance abuse disorders, Codependent No More is characterized by a candid, compassionate, and relatable style. Beattie shares her own story of codependency and recovery, providing readers with a firsthand account of the challenges and triumphs associated with overcoming this condition. She does not position herself as an expert or a professional counselor, but as someone who has experienced what readers are going through and is passionate about helping others heal.

Beattie has written numerous other bestselling books on codependency, relationships, and personal growth, including Beyond Codependency, The Language of Letting Go, and The New Codependency.