44 pages • 1 hour read
E. L. JamesA modern alternative to SparkNotes and CliffsNotes, SuperSummary offers high-quality Study Guides with detailed chapter summaries and analysis of major themes, characters, and more.
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Christian Grey’s need for power and control is clear from the moment he and Ana meet. She calls him a control freak, and he says, “Oh, I exercise control in all things, Miss Steele” (8), establishing the defining quality of his character. Ana’s innocence and inexperience make her a perfect target for Christian. She has no previous experience in love or sex, meaning she has no prior relationships to which she can compare her budding relationship with Christian, which is mired in a constant struggle of power and control. Christian wants her to give herself entirely over to his choices and desires, but Ana doesn’t want to relinquish all her power. She knows her power lies in how much Christian physically desires her, but she tries to hold onto all other personal power with him by negotiating the contract, engaging in banter, and physically leaving, removing herself from his sphere of control.
Dominant/submissive relationships are designed to highlight power dynamics. Cynthia Slater, an early leader in the BDSM community, defines such relationships as “a consensual, eroticized exchange of power.” When healthy, both the dominant and the submissive have a certain degree of power. In theory, the dominant does what he pleases, but in practice, the submissive has much control in that she gets to decide where the limits lie. Christian says this in an email to Ana: “You are the one with all the power. Not I” (398).
In healthy dominant/submissive relationships, trust is paramount. Ana doesn’t entirely trust Christian. She is often on edge or outright afraid of what Christian will do. When he shows up unannounced in her bedroom, she looks around, “plotting an escape route” (187). Christian admits that he “use[s] sex as a weapon” (222), which is not in the spirit of a healthy dominant/submissive relationship. Ana is aware of this. She acknowledges, “That’s what I’m hindered by in this game of seduction. He’s the only one who knows and understands the rules” (222-23). Christian repeatedly shows up without invitation, which Ana tells him shows “stalker tendencies.” She writes “Stalker” as the subject line of her email after he reveals he can track her phone, so he will always find her. He grows jealous and cold if she talks to other men, including her friends. His controlling behavior with sex and intimacy winds up being just that—more controlling than dominant.
Ana comes to understand that Christian’s sexual behavior with her works as a distraction from the actual power problems between them. She considers, “The sex is amazing, he’s wealthy, he’s beautiful, but this is all meaningless without his love, and the real heart-fail is that I don’t know if he’s capable of love” (470). The true power dynamic is that he holds her at arm’s length, refusing to give or accept emotional intimacy. He keeps them drowned in their sexual chemistry and showers Ana with material gifts, buying her a computer and a car, upgrading her to first class; and gifting her a closetful of clothes. These behaviors look like love and care, but they distract from the fact that he refuses to love or care. He uses his dominant role to control how close they can get.
Ana tells him to show her how much it can hurt. What neither of them realize before he hits her with the belt is that she is also trying to learn how badly he can hurt her emotionally. By now the two kinds of pain are entwined for her, whether she was aware of it or not. After, she pulls away from him, angry and shocked by his beating, even though she asked him to do it. When she leaves, she understands that “the physical pain from the bite of a belt is nothing, nothing compared to this devastation” (512). She knows she can’t fulfill his needs, and she knows he can’t fulfill hers either.
BDSM is frequently pathologized and stigmatized as abuse or the result of abusive behavior. While there is no statistical evidence of a causal relationship between trauma and BDSM, there is qualitative research suggesting that those who experienced childhood and adolescent trauma often use BDSM kink to heal from and cope with their trauma. The suggested causal relationship between Christian Grey’s sexual kink and his childhood trauma upset some in the BDSM community who felt James’s portrayal supported harmful stereotypes.
Christian’s sexual proclivities—dominating, hitting, and punishing women—are entangled with several traumatic events from his past. His biological mother was a “crack whore” who died when he was only four years old. He experienced hunger, seemingly during that time. Even though he was adopted into a loving family, the damage done in those formative years had already set in. When he was 15, Mrs. Robinson, a woman his mother’s age, seduced him, perhaps sensing his vulnerability, and she made him her submissive. Ana sees scars she assumes are cigarette burns, but Christian never reveals whether they are burns or their source. Ana considers that Christian is “a man with serious, deep emotional flaws, and he’s dragging [her] into the dark” (353). Christian admits to Ana that he’s “fifty shades of fucked up” (267).
Ana asks why he feels compelled to control her, and he answers, “Because it satisfies a need in me that wasn’t met in my formative years” (435). He then agrees that it’s therapeutic for him, explaining, “There is a very fine line between pleasure and pain, Anastasia. They are two sides of the same coin, one not existing without the other” (219). Christian knows his kink helps him cope with his past traumas. He eroticizes what harmed him, turning the pain of his past into sexual pleasure.
He also uses BDSM to prevent genuine intimacy and vulnerability with other people. He doesn’t allow Ana to touch him or look him in the eyes during sex. He uses sex to keep her at arm’s length. He needs to be in control at all times, presumably keeping any feelings in control as well. He remains formal with Ana much of the time, calling her “Miss Steele.” Ana eventually becomes aware of this disconnect he maintains between sex and love. She wonders, “What does Christian know of love? Seems he didn’t get the unconditional love he was entitled to during his very early years […] The BDSM is a distraction from the real issue. The sex is amazing, he’s wealthy, he’s beautiful, but this is all meaningless without love, and the real heart-fail is that I don’t know if he’s capable of love” (470). Ana knows he will never be vulnerable with her. He will never allow love.
That does not mean Christian doesn’t desire love. In fact, Ana is the first person with whom Christian wants intimacy. He says, “I’ve never wanted more, until I met you” (445). By more, he means the same “more” that she wants—an emotional connection founded on mutual trust, understanding, and vulnerability. Ana wants to be his girlfriend, not just his submissive; near the end of the novel, Christian acknowledges that he wants that too. He is willing to be her boyfriend, but he still won’t allow her to touch him, and he still expects her to be submissive in the Red Room of Pain. She asks him to bring her all the way into his world, one where giving him what he wants, helping him feel loved and whole, means being physically hurt. When he does, she is horrified. She understands she can never be who he needs. She tells him she’s fallen in love with him, and his response—“You can’t love me, Ana. No...that’s wrong […] I can’t make you happy” (507)—confirms he will never be who she needs either: a person who can be vulnerable in intimacy.
When the story opens, Ana is primed to experience an awakening. She is finishing college, about to start her adult life. She’s had no experiences with sex or romance because she’s waiting to feel “the fabled trembling knees, heart-in-my-mouth, butterflies-in-my-belly moments” (22). She hasn’t been attracted to anyone before, and she fears her “literary romantic heroes” (22) have ruined her expectations for romance in real life. By the time she meets Christian Grey, she is ready for something meaningful and interesting to happen in her love life, and she experiences desire for the first time. She is not prepared, however, for the intensity Christian brings to her life.
Christian’s hobbies represent the fine line between feeling alive and danger. He flies helicopters and gliders, activities that create adrenaline, a natural hormone that makes people feel excited and alert. In the helicopter, Ana observes, “my heart is in my mouth. I can’t decide if it’s from nervous anticipation, relief that we’ve arrived alive, or fear that I will fail in some way” (90). This is precisely the kind of excitement she wanted to feel, yet she hadn’t anticipated that this excitement would also stoke fear and nervousness. When Christian takes Ana gliding, she compares the feeling to Icarus flying close to the sun. She is both terrified and thrilled by the experience. This tension between danger and excitement reflects their sexual relationship. She says, “I have been in danger since I met you, Mr. Grey, rules or no rules” (499), referring both to their BDSM relationship and all the other activities he introduces her to.
Ana feels most alive when electrified by their sexual chemistry. She says, “In spite of all his demands, his need to control, his scary vices, I have never felt as alive as I do now” (353). This is especially true during sex. She is constantly sexually aroused in his presence, and she is charged by his constant desire for her. The sex Christian wants, though, is BDSM, which is rife with fear and danger for Ana, who is afraid of the pain. Christian tells her that pleasure and pain, much like excitement and danger, “are two sides of the same coin, one not existing without the other” (219). In other words, to feel awakened, one must face their fears. The story is structured around this truth. In plot terms, this is the innermost cave or the belly of the beast. For Ana to experience true aliveness and awakening, she must also experience pain, and BDSM is the perfect metaphor.
When Ana accommodates Christian’s BDSM desires, she experiences fear alongside excitement: “This is beyond fascinating, beyond erotic. It’s singularly the most exciting and scary thing I’ve ever done” (320). She finds that she derives pleasure from the act. In an email to Christian, she writes, “I felt demeaned, debased, and abused. And much to my mortification, you’re right, I was aroused, and that was unexpected” (290). She manages to reconcile pleasure and pain, as he suggested she should. When she asks to experience her how far the pain could go, though, she learns she can’t live in that liminal space between pleasure and pain. She reflects, “I wanted the dark, to explore how bad it could be—but it’s too dark for me” (505). She wants to stay in their relationship because it makes it feel alive, but ultimately, she understands that the danger is too extreme.
By E. L. James