Initiation

“How horrible it would be if one never changed…if she were condemned to be the plain, shy Millicent of a few years back for the rest of her life.”

This is the first mention of Millicent’s motivations for joining the sorority. This exposition illustrates that she wants to be different from her former self and to continue to grow and change through different experiences and social interactions. This is what happens over the course of the story, though not in the way Millicent expects. Millicent’s insecurity, suggested by her desire to distance herself from her former “plain, shy” self, is at the heart of this character arc, as Millicent gains confidence to be herself.

“‘Remember the part about talking back and smiling,’ Louise Fullerton had put in, laughing.”

Sorority members remind Millicent throughout the story that she should behave submissively toward the sorority members and toward boys. In particular, the sorority girls do not allow the “gophers” to question or flout the members’ authority, and they admonish the initiates that they should not enjoy the hazing process, even though Louise herself clearly finds it amusing. These rules aim to make the initiates grateful for their eventual place within the sorority by reminding them of the alternative.

“Sure, the girls had to come to school for five days without any lipstick on and without curling their hair, and of course everybody noticed them, but what could the teachers do?”

The girls are hazed by being made to stand out. They are forced to sing songs, dance down the sidewalk, ask silly questions, and ignore the era’s beauty conventions; that this serves as hazing illustrates the depth of Societal Pressure to Perform Femininity in Set Ways. Because these beauty standards are implicit social rules, the teachers are not able to remark on them nor interfere with the hazing.

“It was as if she had been sitting for years in a pavilion outside a dance floor, looking in through the windows at the golden interior, with the lights clear and the air like honey, wistfully watching the couples waltzing to the never-ending music, laughing in pairs and groups together, no one alone.”

Millicent’s desperation to become part of a group is clear in this extended metaphor, which likens her current situation to being left outside of a dance. Millicent imagines the ballroom in loving, vivid detail, and the people inside it are “never alone,” suggesting her own loneliness and her desperation for that loneliness to end. The metaphor reappears at the end of the story, where it highlights the change Millicent has undergone; she realizes that “there [are] other ways of getting into the great hall, blazing with lights, of people and of life” (247).

“She would gather up her velvet skirts, her silken train, or whatever the disinherited princess wore in the story books, and come into her rightful kingdom…The bell rang to end study hall.”

Millicent’s (highly gendered) fantasy about what it will be like to be initiated into the sorority is cut brutally short by the school bell. This foreshadows Millicent’s disillusionment with the sorority and the camaraderie it offers.

“I mean, some of them thought Tracy was just a bit too different.”

Louise’s comment speaks directly to a key theme of the story: Fitting in Versus Standing Out. Lousie implies that the former is preferable. The sorority voted Millicent in because she was somewhat similar to its members, whereas Tracy’s choices (knee socks and a backpack) distinguish her from the sorority sisters; difference, in this case, precludes belonging to the in-group.

“‘All you have to do really,’ Louise said, spooning up the last of her sundae, ‘is be very meek and obedient when you’re with Bev and do just what she tells you. Don’t laugh or talk back or try to be funny, or she’ll just make it harder for you, and believe me, she’s a great one for doing that. Be at her house at seven-thirty.’”

Louise emphasizes one of the key elements of the initiation process: submission. Millicent and the other initiates must behave as the servants of the girls who already belong to the sorority. Beyond that, they cannot acknowledge the absurdity of following the orders of someone who is in no way their superior. Bev’s enjoyment of her authority is among the reasons Millicent ultimately decides not to join the sorority.

“And there was an unpleasant anonymity about the label ‘gopher,’ even if that was what they always called the girls being initiated. It was degrading, like being given a number. It was a denial of individuality.”

Here, Millicent first admits her concern with retaining her individuality, which is at odds with her desire to become part of the in-group. When Bev addresses Millicent as “gopher,” she inadvertently calls Millicent’s attention to the surrender of selfhood that is implicit in joining the sorority.

“Herb managed a parting shot. ‘But that one keeps such an attractive silence.’”

Herb has the last word when Bev pulls him away from trying to speak to Millicent. He calls Millicent attractive but associates that attraction with her continued silence. This calls attention to the characteristics that the sorority seems to prize: submission, silence, and obedience.

“‘Just keep a poker face outside,’ Tracy advised. ‘But keep laughing like mad inside.’”

Tracy is one of the few girls who does not seem envious of those invited to join the sorority. These lines demonstrate her nuanced understanding of the initiation process. She knows that Millicent must appear to take the hazing seriously but that it’s quite ridiculous in reality. She also notes that Millicent will have an easier time getting through it if she acknowledges the humor of the situation to herself.

“‘Heather birds’ eyebrows,’ the little man explained. ‘Heather birds live on the mythological moors and fly about all day long, singing wild and sweet in the sun. They’re bright purple and have very tasty eyebrows.’”

This is the exchange that sets Millicent firmly on the path of rebellion. The man in the back of the bus engages with Millicent’s ridiculous hazing question by giving her an even more ridiculous response. They form a comradery based on the silliness of their conversation and, implicitly, the situation Millicent is in. This spontaneous and delightful connection with another human being helps Millicent realize that she does not need the sorority to feel accepted. The heather birds themselves are the story’s chief symbol of the independence Millicent ultimately embraces.

“So many people were shut up tight inside themselves like boxes, yet they would open up, unfolding quite wonderfully, if only you were interested in them. And really, you didn’t have to belong to a club to feel related to other human beings.”

This passage demonstrates the conclusion Millicent comes to as a result of her conversation about the heather birds. As she continues to be forced into interacting with strangers in unusual ways, she realizes that these unusual connections are exactly what draw people together: Conformity can isolate just as much as nonconformity by shutting people within themselves.

“And then, for some reason, Millicent thought of the heather birds. Swooping carefree over the moors, they would go singing and crying out across the great spaces of air, dipping and darting, strong and proud in their freedom and their sometime loneliness. It was then that she made her decision.”

On the last day of the initiation, Millicent lies in bed considering the sparrows outside her window, which all look and behave the same. Then, she imagines the heather birds—different, active, and comfortable in their individuality. She sees herself in the heather birds and thus decides not to become a sorority “sparrow.”