The Colored Museum

Roving follow spots and a timpani drum roll begin this exhibit. The voice of an announcer proclaims the American debut of Lala Lamazing Grace, a world-renowned star. Glamourous images of a musical diva are projected onto the walls.

Lala struts ono the stage and begins singing in an affected French accent. Her song tells the audience how everyone loves her throughout the world. She repeats “everyone” multiple times. She announces that she has finally returned home to the United States, to her people, “my blood, my guts” (39). She compares herself to Aretha Franklin, with roots in the Black church. She questions why America doesn’t accepted her while France embraces her. She compares herself to Paul Robeson, James Baldwin, and Josephine Baker. As she sings a song about leaving to find a better place, her servant Admonia wheels Flo’rance, Lala’s lover, onto the stage. He wears a white mask with blonde hair. He is gagged and tied to a chair.

Lala introduces Admonia and Flo’rance to the audience. She calls Admonia her slightly overweight Black maid and Flo’rance her lover. Lala says she and Flo’rance met in Paris and that he gave Lala her current name. She says he molded her into the person she is today and that they were inseparable until she discovered he’d had affairs with multiple other Black women. She then approaches him and utters that she made herself. She stabs him with a letter opener and breaks into a song about pain and madness.

Admonia enters with a telegram. Lala reads it. The telegram says it is from Lala’s mother and addresses Lala as Sadie. Lala says that Sadie died when Lala was born and that her mother is dead. She goes on to assert that her mother and Josephine Baker fought the Nazis together in the French resistance.

Admonia presents another telegram to Lala. The telegram says that Lala’s mother is not dead and that Lala’s daughter misses her. Becoming angry, Lala loses her French accent, saying she has never had a child and “don’t know nothin’ ’bout no birthin’ no babies” (43). Realizing she has changed her accent, she recovers.

Admonia gives her another telegram that says the child is in the closet. Admonia pushes a button, and a large black door appears behind Lala. Lala says that this is a CIA or FBI plot to take her down.

Music begins playing for Lala’s next song, but she ignores it and keeps on talking about how successful she is around the world. She goes out into the audience, berating them for being more interested in what is behind the door than her performance.

Finally, she opens the door and goes into the closet. A moment later she re-emerges, traumatized. She slams the door behind her. She describes a dream in which she is lost in Sammy Davis Jr.’s hair. She describes wishing she could cut the hair with a machete before being saved by a lava flow of pomade. She accidentally pulls off her wig and reveals her real hair. She sings a song describing the little girl inside her. 

The closet door opens, and a little Black girl comes out. The two stand in pools of light and mirror one another when they move. Finally, they come together and hug. They are joined by Admonia. Lala sings a song about a girl who died so another could be born. The lights fade to black.